Stumbling upon a Reddit post about New York City and the reputation of being rude, someone clearly articulated why there are people who agree with this stereotype and others simply don't see it. The response was about ask culture versus guess culture. The moment of new perspective and clarity hit me so hard that I have to share it and connect it to my classroom. The following video is a great explanation of the two different cultures.
Personally, I lean more towards ask. Being direct with me eliminates any ambiguity of what you might actually mean and it is not my fault that you did not clearly articulate your needs or desires. The superpower of mindreading is one of the last things I would want, especially if I don't need it when you can just tell me what's on your mind if you feel comfortable to do so. Being direct can also mean actually telling me you aren't comfortable to share. Around certain people, I become a guess because it's my attempt to mirror their style and not be offensive. Now, when in my classroom, I have to consider how my students live with these different perspectives and how our interactions are a result of these cultures. Naturally, like-minded people tend to get along well with each other. It's when an ask person and a guess person start to communicate that trouble could happen. Every year, I start the school year off by sharing with students The Yet Mindset but this has me thinking there could be more this or that perspectives worth exploring and sharing, starting with Ask or Guess. Being aware of your own perspective, other perspectives, and how all of them come across to others really opens up better communication and collaboration between students, building a positive classroom culture. Initially, I thought about simply fostering an ask culture in my classroom because that's what I am comfortable with. We tend to follow confirmation bias, especially as we grow older, so rather than restrict students for my benefit (I am literally rolling my eyes with how selfish I sound by saying that) , embracing both viewpoints is another opportunity to incorporate 21st century skills: communication, collaboration, metacognition, and reflection. We can start Teaching 21st Century Skills in a Blended Learning Environment and really building the whole student while also learning and growing ourselves.
References
Therapy in a Nutshell. (2022). Are You Ask Culture or Guess Culture? This Communication Skill Is Life-Changing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9OXlZUfbsPI
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With some downtime between summer graduate school classes and the week of professional development before school starts, naturally, I spend time... doing more reading and professional development, all while watching Netflix Korean romantic comedies. Part of my reading includes required readings for my fall semester classes (basically the Not Read YET on my School Shelf), trying to finally read through The Eye of the World by Robert Jordan, and a bunch of articles and resources for the online GT trainings I am completing. One of the trainings included the Eight Great Gripes of Gifted Students and I felt seen not only as a student, but as a person. An assignment including creating an "infographic" about something we learned, so I used the concerns in the image below. Side note, did you know that Word and PowerPoint have great infographic templates? Being overwhelmed by choices on color schemes, fonts, and all other things that go with creating these things is common for me, but the templates provide relief. When going through any trainings, it is important to consider that while they are usually designed to target a specific student sub-population, the information and strategies we learn about can apply to any student, regardless of the label. Does a student have to be labeled GT to feel different and wish people would accept them as they are? Are students feeling overwhelmed by not only the number of things they can do, but also all of the things they are expected to do? Have you had a student in a "regular" class get teased for being smart? Another side note... we should get away from calling classes regular classes and start calling them level, but that will be for another post that I will eventually link back here. These gripes have come from explicitly surveying students with the GT label, but I wonder how many students would identify with most, if not all, of these. The techniques suggested to address these concerns should apply to everyone. In fact, I am not considering everyone as just GT students or students in general, but our colleagues and administration as well. Which concern do you identify the most with? Are there any concerns that you have learned how to manage?
Have you heard of this story? Look up "The Chicken or the Pig Breakfast" and you will find a variety of versions of this story and its interpretation.
Most people would say they want to be the pig. Total commitment to something is commendable and often praised, especially in education.
I want to be the chicken, I don't want to be the pig or even chicken pot pie.
Wait, does that mean you aren't fully committed to your classroom and your students? No, that's not what this means at all.
What this means is I am not going to sacrifice my entire life for one school year. I want to sustain my wellbeing to produce many impactful school years. Did I used to be the pig? Absolutely. Scott will tell you there were Friday nights I would come home during my first year teaching, lay down on the living room floor, and sleep until Sunday. I poured so much into my students and my classroom that I neglected myself and my husband, to the point of burnout. It seemed like a strange badge of honor, getting praise from administration for being at the school late nights and weekends, surrendering my life for my livelihood.
Did you know that when chickens lay eggs, there is so much calcium removed from their bodies to form the shell that farmers have to be intentional about putting that into their diet, otherwise the hens' bodies will remove the calcium from their own bones... just think about that (and read How Do Chickens Lay Eggs? Understanding Your Egg-Laying Chickens if you want to know more about the sacrifices hens make to lay an egg a day). Also, unhealthy chickens don't usually produce eggs. Often a sign that a hen has made a full recovery from illness or neglect is egg production. The past few years, I have started to set boundaries for myself and articulate these boundaries to others. Saying no is becoming okay in my vocabulary because when I commit to something, I want to ensure that I have the capacity to perform the task or role effectively without having to sacrifice everything else. Speaking up when it feels as though others are trying to force me into being a pig has meant losing some friends along the way. It also means I am not the first person people go to anymore. If you had asked me five or ten years ago how I would feel about that, I would be devastated at the thought of not being the go-to person. Now, it is such a weight off my shoulders because now I am not the only person people might consider a resource or asset. Others are building their capacities too, and maybe they want to be the pig, but I will gladly keep being a chicken. Being the chicken also means I can put my eggs in more than one basket. These baskets can be school-related or personal, and that's okay too. There will be days I need to stop producing and take care of myself and other days when I have the strength and time to accomplish goals. So what are you? The chicken or the pig? Which one do you want to be this year? No matter what you decide, that'll do.
References
Filmlines. (2011). That’ll do pig, that’ll do (ending to Babe). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjQtzV9IZ0Q
I don’t want to be a pie, I don’t like gravy. (2021, September 5). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9T8-t6xSkaY Lord, P., & Park, N. (Directors). (2000, June 23). Chicken Run. DreamWorks Pictures. Noonan, C. (Director). (1995, August 4). Babe. Universal Pictures. Scott, my sister-in-law Stephanie, and I just got back from a trip to Disney World. We had an absolute blast, each getting to achieve our goals. Scott's Goals: Visit Galaxy's Edge. He wanted to go live the Star Wars dream and build a lightsaber, as well as ride in the Millennium Falcon. A bonus was meeting Din Djarin and Grogu. Here are some pictures from our days in Batuu. This is the way. Stephanie's Goals: Visit Toy Story Land, meet Lilo, meet Mulan, and eat around the world. While she loves the aliens and we had fun riding the Slinky Dog roller coaster, the "best day of her life" was eating at the Polynesian and meeting Lilo and Stitch, then traveling to China and meeting Mulan. Eating around the world took some pacing. Here's a collection of pictures from Andy's backyard, Hawaii, and China. Ohana means family. My Goals: Visit Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade and ride as many roller coasters as possible. Now, I know the Wizarding World is not technically Disney, but it is still magical right? I was on the verge of crying a few times being so happy living in a book. It was also fun getting the adrenaline high. Scott and Stephanie ride the milder roller coasters, but I am all for the biggest, fastest, craziest, usually spending the entire ride giggling and clapping. My hair definitely demonstrated the wild factor. Here's a snapshot of some of my time in London and after the thrills. I solemnly swear I am up to no good. Mischief managed. Times like this recharge me for the upcoming school year. There can be so much to do in one day and the order in which you go through the motions really depends on your choices. We balanced spending time taking care of our individual goals, but also staying together and finding experiences we all would enjoy and part of that came from seeing the joy in each other when we got to experience our dreams. Some of Disney's taglines are the happiest place on earth or the most magical place on earth, but there are always times when it doesn't feel that way... especially when it was as hot as it was. It makes cherishing the simple things, like a water fountain or a tree's shade, very easy. Our classrooms have magical moments, but what if we created a different kind of magic? I am not saying our classrooms need to be Disney World but there are some things we can take away from how the parks operate and the experiences we get from them that we could incorporate into our routines, structures, and lessons. What if our learners could decide the order of their different lessons or activities? What if they could pick when to take breaks and for how long? What if we created efficiencies that took away potential misbehavior and redirected them into more positive choices? What if we embraced individual goals and collective ones, giving learners the capacity to enjoy the rewards of achieving all goals?
There is still a little less than a month until the school year starts and I am choosing to hold onto this much needed break for as long as possible, but this trip has been a nice transition from summer to the beginnings of a new school year. I am looking forward to embracing a different kind of magic in my classroom. It does not do well to dwell on dreams and forget to live. I mentioned in my post Learning from Others and Myself - Applying Disruptive Innovation that when I began the Applied Digital Learning (ADL) master's program, I thought the perceived asynchronous nature would mean going "Balls to the Wall" or Not At All and finishing all lessons, assignments, and tests before the July 4th weekend. After the class opened online and our first virtual class meeting, I quickly realized my expectations were way off the mark, but in the best way possible. My collaborative group, including Amanda Mask, Lindsay Krueger, and Hillary Turnage (with Samantha Jimenez and Mikeela Pittman joining on occasion), mostly discussed our other summer class, but we intentionally spent time reviewing each other's ePortfolios. Our different backgrounds and experience, along with the various platforms we use, allowed us to get inspiration from the different perspectives but also confirm our own voices. We created a vulnerable space where sharing our struggles and anxieties of building the ePortfolio from scratch was normal because through each other's experiences, we got better. I would consider Amanda, Lindsay, and Hillary my core group, as we plan on sticking this program out together until the end, holding each other accountable when balancing life, work, and school gets tough as well as celebrating each other's victories. There were other classmates who reached out a few weeks later looking to collaborate and while our key group was established, I replied by saying one-on-one collaboration was something else I would love to participate in. The only person who took me up on my idea was Nwamaka Nwaeme. We spend time focusing solely on our ePortfolios, discussing changes we have made and reading each other's blog posts, as well as commenting. This included changing font sizes and colors after feedback on my post ePortfolios - GenuineLee Me Pt. 2 as well as adding pictures and citations to a variety of other posts. Nwamaka and I during one of our collaborative meetings These meetings are one element of how I have contributed to my learning and the learning of others. Naturally, I track quantitative data. Here are some numbers on my discussion board contributions for the ePortfolio course:
Exactly like my other class, I participated in class meetings and breakout rooms and watched the recordings again if needed. In whole class discussion, I often waited to hear other questions and perspectives, then chimed in when a question had not been asked or addressed. Occasionally, I wrote messages in the general chat or to individual classmates about resources or thoughts that could help support their learning. When I examine how I contributed to the learning of others and myself, particularly comparing my efforts with my professor's key and supporting contributions I would grade myself 98/100. We all have room for improvement but establishing high standards for myself from the onset has really pushed me to reach outside of my comfort zone and grow more than I expected. Starting the Applied Digital Learning (ADL) master's program, I assumed it would be a breeze. I would knock out all of the presumed asynchronous work in a few weeks with time to spare until the next round of classes. Almost instantly, it was apparent that I was wrong. Not only because collaboration is part of the grade, but more importantly because it was what I truly craved in seeking higher education. My life motto is "Balls to the Wall" or Not at All, and that's how I started off in my class "Applying Disruptive Innovation". When class started, I immediately posted an introduction and spent time reading about others' lives in theirs. The next day, after our first class meeting and connecting with Amanda Mask and Lindsay Krueger in breakout rooms, I reached out to them to start collaborating. Dr. Harapnuik didn't give any rules/details on how to form collaborative groups and that initially bothered me because it forced me to a place of vulnerability. What if they already had a group? Would I come off as way too eager? What if they find me overbearing? Thankfully though, I noticed they were equally as enthusiastic about posting in discussion boards and replying to others' ideas, so we started meeting weekly, quickly bringing in Hillary Turnage. Also, Samantha Jimenez and Mikeela Pittman joined on occasion. From left to right, top to bottom: Lindsay, Amanda, myself, Samantha, Hillary, and Mikeela in one of our collaborative meetings Through this group, we divided and conquered! Part of our collective plan has been to stay ahead in order to create opportunities to give/receive feedback, as well as reflect on how we are feeling through the process. This has meant a lot of comments left in Word documents, questions asked and feedback provided during our Zoom conversations, and text messages sent. This really helped to build my innovation plan Teaching 21st Century Skills in a Blended Learning Environment into what it is today based on the feedback I received and the revisions I made accordingly.
We have decided to stick together and be each other's motivators to continue the accelerated ADL program as a team. I needed to find others in education who were at a similar place in life so we could be a supportive community to help each other through the thick and thin, especially when we get to taking classes AND TEACHING THEM! Yikes what a thought. Not only did I rely on this smaller group for collaboration and learning, I tried to foster a similar collaborative environment in the discussion boards and class meetings. I read every article and watched every video, usually more than once. My discussion posts and replies did not simply summarize what I read about or saw but rather wrote how the information connected to me. I also attempted to engage others with questioning and replies to their ideas, building on them to consider new perspectives. A way I tracked my progress was collecting quantitative data. Here are some numbers on my contributions:
I attended class meetings, watched the recordings again if needed, and participated in the breakout rooms. When opportunities arose to ask questions or engage in whole class discussion, I generally waited to see what others had to say, then chimed in when a question my small group or breakout room had that others are afraid to ask. Occasionally, I put information in the general chat or individually messaged classmates with ideas or resources that could help support them in their learning. There was often hesitation: What if I come across as a know-it-all? What if people see me as disingenuous? What I have learned so far is that I just need to be me and reflect on how I can continue to grow and be better. If others appreciate that and are drawn to it, great! If others are not, then that's okay too, but I can learn how to better approach those people. Most people want connection but are afraid to step out of their comfort zone, especially with a virtual stranger. Ultimately, when looking at how I contributed to the learning of others and myself, specifically against the key and supporting contributions my professor has defined, I give myself a 49/50. There are always things I can do better, but I set the bar really high for myself from the beginning and I think I've met it and pushed the bar higher. For my entire life, I have been fascinated with knowledge and learning due to my parents' nurture. Learning was really all-year around, not just between August and May in a classroom. Summer months really allowed for my learning choices. During elementary school, they were filled with library reading challenges and programs, science camps, and Brain Quest workbooks, all anticipated and completed with self-motivated gusto. During middle school, my summer time was spent swinging a baseball bat and tumbling. During high school, required school readings (check out my School Shelf in my AshLee Library) were sprinkled throughout driving school, band practice, more tumbling and cheerleading, volunteering at the local rabbit sanctuary, and practicing Dance Dance Revolution. The artifacts I have from my adolescent education include refrigerator pictures, report cards, the occasional writing assignment, my flute music, and pictures galore found in various boxes through my home and my parents' house. When in college, after hours of attending lectures, experimenting in the labs, and studying with classmates, my artifacts became binders filled with notes, examples, lab data, and writing and presentation drafts, along with PDF files containing numerous pages of lab reports and out-of-date textbooks with no resale value. My first three years of teaching 6th grade science, my portfolio modeled my college structure. My binder contained my teaching philosophy, resume, lesson plans, appraisals, student artifacts, and letters of recommendation from my assistant principal, Critical Friends Group mentor, students, and their parents. I brought this collection into my interview for high school mathematics, and I firmly believe that my portfolio solidified the decision to recommend me for hire. They could see and experience my classroom beyond my responses to their questions because more of myself was expressed in these visuals. Questions they did not even know they had about my teaching style and perspective were answered and they saw potential in what I could bring to their campus that sets me apart from other candidates. As I settled into my new high school classroom, I continued to collect some artifacts here and there, throwing them into a folder where the only descriptor was the year. There wasn't any need or desire to organize another binder, not only because a lot of my documents were now digital, but also because I had no plan of leaving anytime soon unless God directed me down a new path. My resume spruced up every so often when applying for leadership roles on my campus and in my district, but the people interviewing me had literally stepped foot into my classroom on multiple occasions, another opportunity to see who I truly am as a teacher. When my Dean of Instruction and I spoke about getting a master's degree (Masters in Education Does Not Mean Administration...) and I found the Applied Digital Learning program, it really was not what I was expecting but in the best way possible. Without the requirement of an ePortfolio for the program, I probably never would have actually sat down and built this platform. At first, it started as making sure I checked all of the boxes our professor mentioned, but what it is becoming is a living museum of me, math, and more. I have another blog post, Exploring Worlds through ePortfolios, where I mention some things I have learned through the ePortfolio building process.
The biggest idea of what I have learned so far is that for others to really see me and know who I am as a person and as an educator, investing in this labor of love is worth it. I have had the opportunity to connect with people from all over through their ePortfolios (Community in Collaboration) and witness growth in myself and others as we build our innovation plans (Teaching 21st Century Skills in a Blended Learning Environment). As I progress in my career and my calling in life, I will now have a platform to capture the steps along the way, as though I am walking through the halls of a museum, where the displays encompass different perspectives or different time periods. If I can help others grow and learn through my stories and perspective, then what a blessing it will be to do so simply by being vulnerable and open. References Adopt Sari on Petfinder. (n.d.). Petfinder. https://www.petfinder.com/rabbit/sari-65034929/tx/garland/north-texas-rabbit-sanctuary-tx780/
Noble, B. &. (n.d.). Brain Quest Workbook: 3rd Grade|Paperback. Barnes & Noble. https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/brain-quest-workbook-janet-a-meyer/1138044755
Have you ever done something that your heart would not necessarily choose but your head knows it's good for your overall health and wellbeing? Here are some examples:
I am overall a relatively physically healthy person, but that does not make me immune to a constant battle between head and heart, especially when it comes to the added layer of anxiety. My heart knows there's no reason to be stressed out, but my head asks are you sure about that? Being an educator has helped me to learn how to balance the relationship between head and heart and I found it to be a lot like running. I HATE running and it's probably because I am really bad at it. It feels like I've been running for days, only to look down at my Fitbit and see it's been 2 minutes and 43 seconds. Each lap around a track seems longer than the last and if my pacing is faster than 11 minutes per mile, WOW it's time for a reward of Taco Bell for dinner. There's an inevitable recursive cycle that happens; I hate running because I am bad at it, so I don't run often and because I don't run often, I am bad at it, which makes me hate it more. Now I am not saying I hate education. On the contrary, I deeply love it because it is my passion and one of my life's purposes, but it is a lot like running and the battle between my heart and my head when it comes to the activity. There are days when a part of me just wants to give in to the frustration a student has when they don't quite understand a concept yet and just give them the answer, but the other part of me knows that purposeful struggle is necessary for true growth. Part of me wants to just stop enforcing inappropriate cellphone usage and just let them Snapchat and Instagram and TikTok time away until the bell rings, but the other part of me knows that as the adult and the facilitator, I have to provide structure for them to see benefits in putting the devices away or structure for them to not have an opportunity to "be bored". I'm sure you have scenarios you can think of based on your experience. On days I run, it usually does not start off with a true heart and head desire to knock out a few miles. A lot of the times, it comes with discipline, knowing that as soon as I get started, I will not regret the choice I made to follow through. The rewards from the temporary pain are small when individually assessed, but 1% daily growth is huge over time versus 1% daily decline. This comes from James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones, a book that I plan on reading in its entirety as part of my educational journey but have stumbled across excerpts of. Education can be a lot like running. You could consider each class period a sprint, each day a 5K, each week a 10K, each year a marathon, your career an ultra. If we keep putting one foot in front of the other, being disciplined enough to tell our heads to push through when the heart is conflicted, we can be so much stronger. Eventually, our hearts start to catch up, beating faster and sustaining the rhythm as it becomes accustom to the situation. Balancing the heart and the head simply takes experience and adaptation while also recognizing some days are better or worse than others and that has to be okay. Something my Lee family and I would do together is watch reruns of Law and Order SVU on the weekends and for some reason, my sister-in-law Stephanie, my husband Scott, and I latched onto a line when Elliot Stabler yells "we got a runner!". I couldn't find a specific clip of this, but this scene from Reno 911 feels more accurate for education at times... We have to keep running so that our lives can be examples to others of what balance between the head and the heart looks like. We should make sure we are taking care of ourselves so we can take care of others. Are we perfect? Absolutely not, but we can keep making those small gains every day, reflect back, and be in awe of what we are truly capable of. Also, if we run together, we can pull people into this race and motivate each other to keep going. What are some things you've done that your heart and head have been in conflict over? What did you learn from those? Do we have a runner in you?
References
Clear, J. (2015). How to Master the Art of Continuous Improvement. James Clear. https://jamesclear.com/continuous-improvement
Eric. (2012). WE GOT A RUNNER! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIrkI43NIIU Tim Robinson “You Sure About That” Green Screen. (2023, April 12). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZOIpsxfzxw After the holiday weekend and spending time with my in-laws, I loaded my computer for the first time in a few days, knowing exactly what my next post would be about. During the school year, I am balls to the wall. Summer for me is a lot of the not at all part of the phrase. Just to make sure I wasn't completely delusional, I turned to my husband for validation. Here's the exchange that happened maybe 45 seconds ago. Ashley: If you could give my life a motto, what would it be? Scott: Balls to the wall or not at all. There's a nice ring to it, and Scott has known me well enough over the past almost two decades which zone I am in at any given moment. Balls to the wall could be replaced with full throttle or pedal to the medal or full steam ahead and most people would understand those references right? Cars going really fast or even trains, but where in the world did balls to the wall come from? I learned something new today. Balls to the wall probably comes from aviation. In a pilot's cockpit, the throttle levers had ball-shaped grips and in order to go to top speeds, they had to push the lever towards what is considered the firewall (Sheidlower, 2006). There are inevitably arguments made that this leads to burnout and I assure you I have experienced phases of burnout throughout my life, not just as an educator. But what I am also learning is that through my different stages of the year, my life cannot be balls to the wall or not at all for everything at the same time, but I can incorporate some aspects of one zone in certain areas and other aspects of the other zone in other areas. For example, right now, I am balls to the wall when it comes to reading romantic comedies through Kindle Unlimited. I am not at all with making lesson plans. I am balls to the wall during Zumba, not at all when cooking (takeout for me please!). When considering incorporating blended learning in my classroom, I have to keep in mind that it cannot be 100% one or the other aspect of my life motto. There has to be balance. Some days there will be station rotations, some days not. Some days, there will be collaboration, others will have reflection and feedback, and some days will be a traditional pencil and paper assessment. If I were to go balls to the wall with the blended learning environment, burnout is inevitable. What is your life motto? References Sheidlower, J. (2006, February 10). Balls in the Air. Slate. https://slate.com/news-and-politics/2006/02/why-we-say-balls-to-the-wall.html#:~:text=So%2C%20literally%20pushing%20the%20balls
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My husband lovingly teases me when I reflect on my day with him and say "I learned something new today!" because he would be surprised if I didn't learn something new.
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