Consider when you first learned about the concept of numbers and counting. You probably learned one to ten because of your fingers and toes, using a tangible representation. At this developmental stage, this information was the reality, but eventually we learn that there are numbers beyond that.
Counting to 20, or 100, became another milestone. Negative numbers represent the lack or reduction of a quantity, so comprehending we can count forwards and backwards became the new truth. Eventually math extends to fractions and decimals, irrational numbers, and even more abstract concepts like imaginary or complex numbers. When does it stop? Getting metacognitive, what are numbers without objects? Did we discover math or invent it? Jeff Dekofsky addresses this question. This progression through the simple concept of numbers can happen organically in a mathematics classroom. It is not limited to numbers, really any math idea or topic can be expanded upon in this way. Now, consider when we first learn to communicate. We start expressing ourselves through sound and movement, developing oral language starting with simple one-word statements and eventually crawling, walking, and running around to speak through body language. As we age, we acquire new vocabulary in a variety of contexts, such as academically through literature, or socially through friend groups and family dynamics. We develop multiple ways of conveying our thoughts, feelings, and ideas. According to Lingua (2022), there are over 7,000 languages around the world, and new bussin’ words are added to language every year. In her TEDTalk, Lera Bordotisky explores how languages shapes the way we think. Just as math concepts and language can be organically explored, so can 21st century skills. What if this approach is the cheat code to our future? My innovation project,teaching 21st century skills in a blended learning environment through the lens of mathematics has definitely evolved from the past into the present and it will continue to evolve towards the future. As I reflect on my journey, I need to consider how to start at the foundation and root of one idea, building and growing outwards and upwards, expanding to new connections and possibilities.
The Past
When first developing my innovation plan, it really inspired me to start thinking about what education gifted me, which is the skills and characteristics that support my continuous growth and improvement towards success. Being a millennial and growing up in the transition of Y2K, 21st century skills were something society just began articulating and my path through high school in the International Baccalaureate (IB) program and college gave me opportunities to develop these skills real-time. My transition from a student to an educator aligned with my learning philosophy and starting the Applied Digital Learning (ADL) program, I learned about the new digital age and new learning culture. A lot of reading research and literature on blended learning environments and 21st century skills reinforced my experiences and were consolidated in a literature review. I spent the summer producing an implementation outline ambitiously anticipating I could flip my classroom on its head within a year and refine after the follow two. Unfortunately, while I was learning what my mind and spirit felt true all along, putting those ideas into action fell short.
Creating my innovation plan felt natural and sharing my ideas with others was also exciting. A new school year meant this new opportunity to go for it and transitioning from teaching Precalculus (a subject I had taught consistently for the past seven years) to teaching Algebra 2 also provided a chance to use the change for the better. Breaking the cycle of factory model is hard, especially when collaborating with other teachers who have a fixed mindset and are closer to the end of their careers. With the team I am working with this year, I honestly cannot blame them at times for wanting to stick with what is comfortable because everything about education is exhausting. Despite my initial enthusiasm, there were many obstacles hindering me, and the vortex of the whirlwind sucked me right up into the abyss of a fixed mindset, rather than my yet mindset. I found myself ignoring my innovation plan because it seemed like it would have created double work for me on a lonely island under attack from the outside world. My soul has felt crushed one too many times to count for pouring my blood, sweat, and tears into a lesson, unit, activity, student, etc. that feels like no positive results are being produced. I want to be a great teacher, but what makes a great teacher?
Periodically, I would develop a lesson that incorporated some technology components, but it was not done consistently or with intention; I was just using technology for technology's sake or doing a great activity amid all the same old repetitive routine. This barely appeased my guilt of not teaching 21st century skills through the lens of mathematics in a blended learning environment to meet my student needs. Looking at my Implementation Outline – Version 1, it is safe to say I have done nothing since August 2023 as listed in this outline. If I have, it was done by accident or without the focus of the innovation plan. Everything changed though in December to now.
The Present
As semester exams were just around the corner, an overwhelming sense of regret and frustration brought me to a breaking point. When students were demonstrating that they retained little content but also lacked the skills necessary to take responsibility for their learning, it forced me to reflect and be self-critical. How can I expect students to attain these skills if I have yet to give them the significant learning environment in which to develop and refine them? I had completed practically nothing except the initial stages of my project.
In one of the discussion boards, a classmate recommended Building Thinking Classrooms in Mathematics by Peter Liljedahl, so I added it to my list of books. Coincidently, a few months later, my district launched a cohort to do a book study on that same book. The first meeting in November incorporated the first three practices within Liljedahl’s writing and encouraged implementing some of the 14 practices in our classrooms. I told myself I would wait until the spring semester, or even next school year, pushing what needed to be done now into the future. It hit me like a brick wall. I needed to adapt my innovation plan to utilize these practices that break the norms of a traditional mathematics classroom and through these structures, identify technological components that would enhance the learning through a blended learning environment. I drafted, revised, and finalized an article about my journey from past to present, promoting the publication through podcasting and reflecting on writing through writing. I am learning that I am still a recovering perfectionist and that my life of "balls to the wall or not at all" can really be a detriment to my professional growth and ultimately my students’ learning and engagement. I would not consider my innovation plan a win or a loss, but unavoidable in identifying how to actually follow through with my plans.
The Future
Now that I can reflect on what I have done and am currently doing, seeing the the back of the puzzle box - the big picture, there are some things I intend to address and implement in the future.
Amidst the chaos, I realized the importance of getting more people alongside me earlier on and using my voice to speak up and say that we should try innovative ideas for students. If anyone questions us, we need to stand firm and articulate that what used to work is no longer effective and we cannot be instructing students with the ways of the 20th century, considering where the head and heart meet. This is especially difficult with math because it seems like math never changes. Facts are facts, order of operations will always be true, and there's not really ways to be creative with math when we know the most "efficient" ways to solve problems. This is not true, but the fixed mindset of some of my colleagues believe this in their souls. Fortunately, I have one colleague in my content team, along with the Building Thinking Classrooms cohort, doing similar innovative structures to collaborate with, and I can take my experience from this program and really use it to my advantage (plus there will be so much more time once I graduate!). Another improvement is being slow and steady with my changes within a NOW culture. I initially asked why not now? but it takes time and effort to figure out what works and what does not, along with making the systems and structures that do work more efficient over time. My innovation plan will look remarkably similar to before, but the timeline will be adjusted to refine components at a more appropriate and sensible pace. Focusing on a few 21st century skills, such as communication, collaboration, and reflection, rather than the larger list, will also make things less daunting. This is definitely something I would have done differently if I could go back in time and start again. My ambitious nature can be beneficial in certain situations, but this was a time when the goal’s timeline was too sudden to realistically implement amongst the other obligations as a teacher. Through my roles as a content team member, department lead, and cohort member, I will intentionally share what I am doing in my classroom with my peers through writing, conversation, and even observations. Inviting others into this new world will also hold me more accountable with following through on my plans. My failure to follow through with my plans is actually a win. Often times, educators do dream big, but we have conflicting responsibilities and commitments that hinder our capacity to make these dreams a reality. What I have learned throughout the ADL program is that a lot of work is done behind the scenes before anything can be done in front of the students. This journey of learning and growth highlights the iterative disposition of education, preparing me for the challenges and opportunities that lie ahead.
References
Boroditsky, L. (2018). How language shapes the way we think | Lera Boroditsky [Ted Talk]. In YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKK7wGAYP6k
Dekofsky, J. (2014). Is math discovered or invented? - Jeff Dekofsky [YouTube Video]. In YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X_xR5Kes4Rs Fractions explained - a guide for parents. (n.d.). Komodo Learning. https://komodomath.com/us/blog/fractions-explained-parents-guide Lamb, R., & Shields, J. (2008, June 24). How are Fibonacci numbers expressed in nature? HowStuffWorks. https://science.howstuffworks.com/math-concepts/fibonacci-nature.htm Liljedahl, P. (n.d.-a). 14 practices. 14 Practices. https://buildingthinkingclassrooms.com/14-practices/ Liljedahl, P. (n.d.-b). Https://buildingthinkingclassrooms.com/. Building Thinking Classrooms. https://buildingthinkingclassrooms.com/ Liljedahl, P. (2021). Building thinking classrooms in mathematics, grades K-12 : 14 teaching practices for enhancing learning. Sage Publications Inc. Lingua. (2022, June 29). How many languages are there in the world? | lingua.edu. Lingua.edu. https://lingua.edu/how-many-languages-are-there-in-the-world/ Newmarket. (2019, November 30). How to get past counting on fingers & toes. https://www.mathnasium.com/ca/math-centres/newmarket/news/how-to-get-past-counting-on-fingers-toes TEDx Talks. (2017). What makes a good teacher great? | Azul Terronez | TEDxSantoDomingo. In YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrU6YJle6Q4
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This term has been rough on a number of fronts. The figurative rollercoaster has me going all over the place. Most of the time, I just ride the ups and downs with a growth mindset, knowing the chaos will periodically subside and I can rest before the tide rushes back in. These current eight-week terms of graduate schools have felt like eight days and eight months simultaneously. I am going to use one of m favorite picture of myself, my husband Scott, and my sister-in-law Stephanie to describe this most recent chapter in my life. Let’s start with Stephanie. The first big drop hit, and I went all in screaming my lungs out. It was also in the beginning that Katie joined our “core four” collaborative group. Her and I had worked together individually, authentically connecting and contributing to the dots, and circumstances led her to looking for others to work with in addition to her core group. I got ahead in a lot of assignments, posted enthusiastically in discussion boards, and even read most resources before the term officially started (thank you Dr. Harapnuik for blogging about the resources once upon a time). My collaborative group probably thought I had a new kind of chaotic energy with all my gifs and texts in our group chat. Being labeled an overzealous overachiever can be exhausting, especially when I hit the lows. Scott’s entire body position and face embodies the middle of this term. I felt paralyzed with all of the work I had for school, teaching, and life as a wife and daughter. Crippled by overstimulation and anxiety, I froze and went missing in action for a while. Assignments were getting done last minute and I did not always get to class on time, if at all. I’ve talked about my mental health journey and these few pages of the story could have been ripped out of that book and glued straight into this one. I went from "balls to the wall" to not at all but not at all was not an option. Fortunately, those around me continued to support and love me, being a sounding board to hear my frustrations and sorrows and allow me time and space to come out of the darkness into the light. In this last week, I am getting back to being more me, smiling almost in a psychotic way while the whirlwind swirls around me. I have revisited discussion boards, revised my assignments, provided feedback and encouragement to my peers, and started to coast into Spring Break. My publication about Building Thinking Classrooms by Peter Liljedahl, blended learning, and 21st century skills goes hand in hand with my action research plan, which will hopefully answer the question “in what ways do Desmos activities (a technological tool) impact student growth in 21st century skills of communication and collaboration (two key components of Building Thinking Classrooms) so my contributions to learning are interconnected and tightly intertwined. Seeing connections in my learning and investing myself more in the authentic learning experiences my master’s program has strengthened my resolve to keep fighting the food fight and give my best of right now. For both of my classes, Resources in Digital Environments and Assessing Digital Learning Instruction, I would give myself a 97/100. While I definitely did not do my best this term compared to other terms, I did my best given the circumstances and stresses I was facing.
When I first imagined my experience in graduate school, I envisioned reading and regurgitating content and theories alongside systematically following procedural assignments that would teach me educational technology tools to create textbook-like curriculum and lessons. I planned on going through the motions of school and coming out on the other side with a degree that earns me a few more dollars per paycheck and enhances my resume for future education endeavors. Man, I was wrong.
This false sense of reality mirrors my initial expectations of being a teacher in the classroom. I thought I would design and implement lessons that I could continuously recycle year after year, going through the motions of teaching. Professional development might teach me a thing or two that I can bring back to the classroom that would support me changing the lives of my students in the process. Never did I dream that I would be at this point in my life and career, finding myself learning and growing more through experience, trial and error, and collaborative communities that emphasize continuous reflection and adaptation. If you ask me to talk about my journey through life, in and out of school, I likely would not know where to start. It would inevitably be a brain dump of information seemingly disconnected from one idea to the next... but it makes sense in my mind. The only person who loves me enough to tolerate this chaos besides Jesus is my husband Scott. Most of the time, I sense I scare people... Writing and developing my voice to connect the analytical, cognitive side of my perspective to my free-flowing emotional sand spiritual side allows me to take my word vomit ideas and cohesively pain a picture others can view, and hopefully appreciate and be inspired by, to take their own artistry of education and life further. The procedural process of brainstorming ideas, creating an outline, drafting an article, and revising and editing the work based on an abundance of feedback from different perspectives has led me on a voyage to building my courage and bravery to speak louder than my current volume to a larger audience than my collaborative group, my family, and my tight knit community of colleagues at my campus. Promoting my publication through podcasting was definitely a new level of learning too as I relied heavily on my classmates' strengths to create a quality product. Documenting my experience from the burnout (we all need a break) and defeat of student disengagement and lack of student thinking to the renewal of my faith in the future by providing students opportunities to build 21st century skills in a blended learning environment through the lens of mathematics and trying practices from Building Thinking Classrooms by Peter Liljedahl has increased my confidence that my vulnerability will inspire other teachers like me to continue to dream big for our students. I hope to publish at Texas Council of Teachers of Mathematics or National Council of Teachers in Mathematics to expand my community further and speak to other like-minded professionals eager to set sail into the reality of our education future and not the delusion or mirage, figments of our imagination as to what we thought education is. The whole writing process is just what we expect out of our students as we guide them not only to learn our content but also learn to be lifelong learners, continuously evolving, not just going through the mundane motions of life but thrive in adventure and possibility. The work of learning is never done and the journey has more value and fulfillment than any checkpoint or destination. Because of publication consideration requirements, I cannot post my products I created throughout this cycle. However, I do look forward to blogging some day soon with a celebration of formal publication and linking to an official professional website, but in the meantime, keep learning something new every day. I know I am.
References
Conspiracy Charlie Day GIF - conspiracy Charlie Day crazy - discover & share gifs. (n.d.). Tenor.com. https://tenor.com/view/conspiracy-charlie-day-crazy-always-sunny-in-philadelphia-qanon-gif-23738584
When I first considered my innovation plan, teaching 21st century skills My journey through the Building Thinking Classrooms and being bold in writing for publication has been really encouraging for a number of reasons. Learning that I am not alone in my frustrations with the traditional mathematics classroom brings a sense of comradery but also urgency to collectively disrupt the status quo and establish new norms for the future of education. Being validated in the hard work by instructional coaches and administration has also been reassuring. When feedback from the principal's observation includes "all students were engaged and actively participating in lesson, including students who struggle to find their pacing in other classes. Intentionality of grouping is effective and appreciated. Clear evidence of student retention of and ability to employ skills was observed throughout classroom visit", I know something must be going right. It also has been really empowering to hear how other educators in different roles, schools, and subjects are also transforming education in their own capacity.
Through my master's program, I have been blessed to be a part of a collaborative community that has quite a bit in common but also diversity in our different roles in education. When we review each other's work, these fresh perspectives enhance our own and we can even come together to see the bigger picture of how our individual ripples in the pond are actually making giant waves in the ocean. We realized our impact on inspiring other educators with what we doing is better when we come together. While we have such distinct sets of circumstances, common themes of lifelong learning, play, and opportunity can be felt throughout our work. Relying on the expertise of Amanda Mask with her knowledge of video and audio editing in iCloud, Hillary Turnage and Lindsay Krueger with their knowledge of Canva and its incredible capabilities, and Katie Beauchene with her knowledge of a plethora of educational tools her teachers have played with through her coaching cycles, we decided to commit to spending time having a conversation in a podcast. Our podcast provides a glimpse into what we are writing for publication, promoting our perspective to inspire others to share their voice too. I hope you enjoy listening to our first episode by clicking the EdTech Talks Podcast graphic and become excited to read more in depth about our individual pieces. While my piece is in the middle, it is worth your time to listen and gain perspective on an even bigger picture. Promoting our publications through podcasting brings more opportunity to make waves together. Just because I am a mathematics teacher does not mean I dislike reading and writing. In fact, I remember as a young student, one of my dreams was to be an author and illustrator because escaping into stories opened up the universe in the palms of my hands and I wanted to be a part of that creation. As my education progressed, my writing developed from a fictional foundation to analytical in a variety of subjects:
My learning philosophy is rooted in Jean Piaget’s cognitivist theory, identifying and applying patterns and my experience has strengthened my ability to connect the abstract with vivid imagery as I build particular connections between seemingly unrelated ideas. Just the other day, a student was struggling with remembering how to square a binomial. She kept distributing the square to the terms rather than distributing the terms to each other. I tried showing her a numerical example, yet every time I checked in with her progress, she kept making the same mistake. This simple conversation changed everything.
Mrs. Lee: "You are in wrestling right? How many shoulders do you have to pin to win?" Student, smiling: "Two." Mrs. Lee: "Think of these squared binomials like shoulders, you have to pin both down to win the match, so write both of them to pin them down." That stuck. All I have to do now is walk by and say PIN THEM DOWN, she smiles and builds her confidence in her math abilities. I find myself making analogies, similes, and metaphors constantly to connect the abstract to the concrete for my students and the same is true for my writing. As I have strengthened my voice through my master's program, I am finding myself being bolder with my writing in the sense of sharing my story and journey through life and education with a balance between the creative components of writing and the analytical side. One of my assignments is writing with the intention to submit the work for publication. Some considerations for publications I have found include:
All of these publications have stated that the use of AI is discouraged but if it is used, it needs to be explicitly mentioned. Most require a short biography as well as evidence of other publications. The documents need to be in Word with APA references. Submissions are done via email or directly on the publication website. My writing can go in a variety of directions and with so many options, if rejected, I will adapt writing to meet other publication requirements and needs, but the Texas Council of Teachers of Mathematics Call for Voices from the Classroom fits nicely in my big picture. Thus, I began with an outline and started writing a rough draft about my journey in transforming my mathematics classroom from the past to the future with the practices of Building Thinking Classrooms to build 21st century skills. My Community in Collaboration is diverse, as we serve in a wide range of roles in education, so encouraging each other and providing valuable feedback/feedforward meant establishing a rubric that could easily apply to our various topics and writing approaches. When creating rubrics for students, I have used RubiStar but after exploring ChatGPT, I used AI to generate a rubric for a publication in education. With some adjustments and review from my group, we agreed upon the categories and their breakdown into components and points. These included overall content, organization and structure, writing style and clarity, evidence and support, critical thinking and reflection, and conclusion and implications Not only did we provide comments in each other's rough drafts with all sorts of fixes, adjustments, and considerations, we filled in our rubrics with points and overall feedback/feedforward. Part of the requirements for publication submission is not publishing your work anywhere else, so it would not be appropriate for me to post my rough draft here but you can get a sense of my work from my rough draft peer assessment. Overall, the feedback/feedforward I received validated my perspective but provided meaningful insight on how to enhance it, including fixes to some grammar and punctation, suggestions on how to rephrase ideas to be succinct, and recommendations to bring in more research and literature. The average score I received was a 48.94/50 and honestly, I think my group was generous. Because my imagination and connections are wild and widespread, I tend to be verbose and add unnecessary detail so my clarity can improve. There is also opportunity for me to add more research beyond my classroom setting to demonstrate that my journey is not a fluke but a reality many can experience in their own classroom. Moving forward, I am going to be even bolder and seek feedback from peers at my campus and the district who do not know the context of the graduate school assignment to receive a more comprehensive review of my work. Maybe I will fulfill a childhood dream of being an author in a way I could have neve imagined and be an official published writer! In the blink of an eye, my second term of my master’s is coming to a close. We just started the semester right? The accelerated program definitely feels accelerated… Fortunately, what is really working well has been maintaining the collaborative group I met this summer, but our approach to collaboration shifted once the school year started. Amanda, Hillary, Lindsay, and myself, along with Mikeela and Samantha, have drastically different schedules and family lives, so we found ourselves texting each other encouraging, and sometimes witty messages, as we struggled balancing all of the obligations of our jobs, our families, our Leading Organization Change class, as well as the Growth Mindset course. We found stability in dividing and conquering some of the reading, summarizing what we have read in a shared document, and providing feedback to blog posts and assignment pages when needed in Zoom meetings. Through our collaboration too, we often delegated who was the “leader” in that particular assignment or phase because we knew that week-to-week, someone would be a little less active in the collaboration due to other components of life… which includes…. when I got sick with the flu the first weekend of September and fell behind in my coursework. There were nights when the readings, assignments, videos and discussions were on the bottom of my list because it was necessary for me to take care of my physical well-being first. Part of the reason I became so quickly incapacitated was my struggle with time management. My body rapidly decided I need to stop for a moment. Balancing my different roles, such as campus Algebra 2 team leader, campus department leader, district national merit preparation program facilitator, along with wife, friend, daughter, was overwhelming but really I am partially to blame. My inner-procrastinator came out, and even though I know procrastination is a fight-or-flight response (check out this article from Psychology Today), this little bird wanted to desperately take flight. Recognizing where I have been and how far I have come in my journey, including my mental health journey, brought into perspective that we exist in ebbs and flows, and it is okay to be at a low as long as you do not settle there and dwell in the pit. Considering my why and how I want to be a butterfly, I did not let these setbacks stop me from moving forward one small step at a time. Even if I did not always participate in the discussion boards during the appropriate weeks, at least twice a week I go into the boards and read what others have written. I would reply when I feel as though my perspective would add value to the conversation or when I think words of affirmation or gratitude would support the growth of others. This rang true in our weekly class meetings and discussions, speaking up to engage in conversation, individually messaging people with ideas and feedback, etc. These intentional actions led me to consistently be one of the top contributors to the discussion boards and breakout rooms. This also established a routine for me of revising assignments or blog posts to incorporate my new learning and connections after revisiting discussions or other people’s ePortfolios. All of my posts and replies are very authentic and genuinely driven by my desire to connect with people and encourage others to do the same. Ironically, the only discussion board that I did not directly engage in was the networking discussion because I felt as though the list I would create would not be true to my actual engagement with them. The groups I engage with the most frequently are not necessarily formal because I do not have the capacity to devote any more time or energy into another thing that would only be done to satisfy an assignment requirement. Ultimately, the course on growth mindset has helped me see growth mindset in growth mindset... life and the whirlwind can take over but once the storm clears and the rainbow comes, we can keep moving forward together. While I did not reach my fullest potential, I would give myself a 95/100 to my contributions to learning in my Growth Mindset course. Now that I have experienced the beginning of the school year in addition to late nights completing my master’s program, I am back on track ready to keep learning, growing, improving, and being the best I can be each day. References Tarnowski, D. (2023, September 13). Instagram. Www.instagram.com. https://www.instagram.com/p/CxIuYEhuRul/?hl=en
I think it was around nine years old though that I experienced my first panic attack. I was in our big green van with my mom, going home after running errands, and suddenly, an elephant was sitting on my chest, and I was being internally crushed with no room to externally move. I could not breathe, I felt numb all over, and my mind went to the worst place possible – I am dying. Going through an intersection, my mom asked if I was okay and the moment passed.
At age ten, I remember playing in the living room with a plastic bag, acting like it was a parachute and jumping off the chair like a skydiver. Out of nowhere, a thought popped into my head: “there will be a day I am not a kid anymore and I do not get to play”. Even turning ten was traumatizing, because the realization that my age was DOUBLE DIGITS meant I was getting old, and my morality was quickly approaching. It reminds me of the first few lines of lyrics from Katy Perry's song, Firework.
Junior year of high school, I started experiencing extreme vertigo. The best way I could describe it… do you know how you can swirl water in a water bottle or blender around, stop, but the water keeps spinning like a tornado? That’s what vertigo feels like, the swirling water in your head when everything else is standing still. Telling my mom about this, I went to doctors and neurologists and endured MRI and EEGs to see if I had a tumor or was having seizures. The results? Nothing, nothing was wrong and thankfully the figurative water was not spilling out everywhere...
Senior year of high school is really when my symptoms started to rear their ugly heads. Working my entire life to be involved in the highest academic program in the district while managing cheerleading, band, and a plethora of other organizations and volunteer work, to then graduate in the top twenty students of the class of over 500 and just be done was overwhelming to say the least. Suicidal thoughts, unexplained moments of panic and extremely draining crying sessions, those became normal. In the summer between high school and college, I went to my mom and told her I thought I needed help. She understands now what I was going through to an extent, but at the time, she just told me it was normal to feel this way when being close to going off to college. Fortunately, that did not stop me from getting help. I went to my best friend’s mom, Lillie, and asked her to take me to a psychologist appointment, scrapping money together from birthdays and graduation gifts to pay without submitting insurance. There, the psychologist told me after one session that they thought I had been suffering from anxiety and depression since I was around eight but had been so busy that I became what we now call a person with “high-functioning anxiety” so now that I did not have much to keep me busy, the symptoms were surfacing because my brain had the capacity to play its tricks. With this diagnosis in hand, I went back to my mom and explained. From there, we came up with a plan together to get me the professional help I needed. Twice-a-week therapy sessions in college, combined with medication and the support of my family and friends, helped me work through the struggle, identify triggers, and learn how to cope healthily when experiencing anxiety and depression. Do I still experience triggers and symptoms of anxiety and depression? Absolutely! Nail biting will be a habit I do not see breaking any time soon (maybe I need a growth mindset on that...) but I have the resources, tools, and voice to speak up when I need help and advocate for myself without feeling selfish, stupid, or broken. This includes my support system: my mom (pictured on the left), my best friend who is now my husband Scott (pictured in the middle), and Lillie who is now my mother-in-law (pictured on the right), as well as my other friends and family. I had teachers who cared for me, absolutely, and they taught me so much more than the academic knowledge I took to college and beyond, but they also taught me other skills, now defined as 21st century skills. Occasionally teachers, like Ms. Patak, would check in with me, but there was not much emphasis in the educational system on addressing the non-academic needs. I do not even know who my counselor was in school because my class schedule was pretty much set from 6th grade through 12th. The only time I might have met with them is for scholarship applications and getting a transcript ready to submit in college applications. Now, in light of the pandemic, employing counselors that address academics as well as the social, emotional, and mental needs of students is being prioritized. With this shift in focus, students are being treated more like people and less like factory workers who we get to churn out a specific, monotonous set of tasks. The reason I am in education, my why, also connects to my journey in my mental health. My ePortfolio and blog posts are a continuously evolving exhibits in living museum of me, math, and more. Today, talking about mental health and sharing my journey, is another new addition open for others to explore and experience. What is your journey with mental health? May this be an encouragement for you to share your journey with others so we can all keep healing and growing together.
References
Basic Fun! (2023). K’NEX Ferris Wheel. https://www.basicfun.com/product/knex-thrill-rides-3-in-1-classic-amusement-park-building-set/
Katy Perry. (n.d.). AZQuotes.com. https://www.azquotes.com/quote/436551 Plante, C. (2016, May 5). This Is Fine creator explains the timelessness of his meme. The Verge; The Verge. https://www.theverge.com/2016/5/5/11592622/this-is-fine-meme-comic Sick Science! (2009, March 5). Tornado Tube - Vortex in a Bottle. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dv6vQU94wws |
My husband lovingly teases me when I reflect on my day with him and say "I learned something new today!" because he would be surprised if I didn't learn something new.
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